Monday 21 January 2013

Beyond Thought

Now I am gonna write it out publicly. Enough is enough.

The case is this:
I was on my holiday trip to Port Blair. We all were ready for the next event - seeing adivasis, cavemen. that day, before sitting in bus, my mood was somewhat (-ve) or sad. so in the initial journey one kind of thoughts were coming in mind ((-ve) type), and I was well applying reason and logic to extend and generalize them further to draw out some conclusions about Truth or Life. those conclusions were looking very right and true at those moments.
Now, as the journey proceeded, we were passing through a jungle. and seeing all the variety of beauty all around me my mood changed in pleasant and joyous..i.e. (+ve). after this (+ve) kind of thoughts started coming in mind; and again I applied logic and reason and drew out different conclusions about life and truth. and again, conclusions were looking very right and true at those moments.
So you see, conclusions about a thing depends mostly on one's mood, or better say, state of mind. You cannot find any fault in the logics applied in drawing out conclusions.  No, logic applied is always right. but still the conclusion is wrong and faulty. that's because its origin was faulty. its origin was impermanent.
the original, the initial thoughts didn't occur independently. they depend on state of mind. the kind of state your mind has, same kind of thoughts will originate from it, bathed in its color, its flavor  they can't be independent or pure. and so, can't be right.

so this is what I want to say: THOUGHTS ARE UNRELIABLE.

the case above is actually a very ordinary case. such a thing happens with everybody many times. that hum jaisa dekhenge jahan he waisa hi, the nature of world depends on how we see it. and this finding too is a very ordinary finding. But even after finding and knowing it conceptually, I somehow always get lost in its net.
Its not the first time I am finding this fact that thoughts are unreliable. I had strongly realized it when my state of mind went through a big change (circle of life). at that time also I saw strongly how all my thoughts, my ideals, my views, my sankalps..all these things which characterizes me and which I think I am, how strongly they depends on my state of mind. and how easily most of them got changed once my state of mind changed. But slowly slowly again new kind of thoughts started coming and new kind of views started becoming. and I was again lost in them, thinking them as so mine, so permanent, so true. And I again started working and efforting in the direction to try to grow and perfectize them, as if they are extremely important in my life. One (I) may easily waste weeks, months, years or even whole life in considering these thoughts as something very important and trying to develop them. these thoughts are very illusory, very mine looking, very close, very true looking.
Also the question comes - what else to believe, what else to follow, what else to seek if not my own thoughts? If my own thoughts are unreliable, what else to rely on? well, i have no answer to this question as per my experience. but in theory i may say that we should seek and rely on growth of our being, the real being, the real 'I'. that maybe of some real use, some real significance.


   
                                                     this is our guiding light!